Warning: This blog is totally sarcastic.
When the girls were little, I could tell what was wrong by their cry. If they were hungry, they had a whiny sound and they would move their heads back and forth. When they were tired, they would arch their back and turn. When they were down right mad they would just wail.
You get a break from the crying around the age of 3 until about…puberty. Out of nowhere, it happens…the tears start and you do not know why. You have to learn a complete crying language all over again. And this time it is much MUCH more complicated.
There are many times that Caroline lives on Caroline Street, Grace lives on Grace Street, and John lives on Johnny Street. I drive along their streets just dropping everybody off at their destination and picking them up as needed. Since John can drive, he just shows up when he is not working. Soooooo, when the street goes to two ways, it can get a little complicated. When adolescent girls are reminded that the world DOES not revolve around them, it can be an eye opening experience!!!! Guess what happens? Tears= National Make Your Daughter Cry Day.
Then, I am the bubble popper. You have to pop the bubble that they float around in thinking about themselves. Ummmm, excuse me, but let me set you straight. One, until you pay the bills, your phone is mine. Two, I am not your uber driver because you do not pay me any money to drive you. Do not assume I can take you anywhere anytime. It does not work that way. Three, we have four schedules in our house and you are responsible for yours and the work that it takes to prepare for your day. I will pick you up, Dad will pick you up, someone will pick you up….sometime. Be patient. We may be late because we have lives, jobs, and commitments. The realization on a daily basis that the world does not revolve around you= National Make Your Daughter Cry Day.
Finally, the “Do Hard Things” speech can be delivered in a variety of ways. It can be delivered gently at the end of the day when nobody has cried and mom is calm and has not been sucked dry by all of the people in the world. The speech can be delivered in a “you can do it” cheerleader attitude with a glass of wine in hand making dinner or probably just ordering pizza. Another method could be before coffee in the morning, when you are standing in front of me crying because you forgot a project that is due today and didn’t do your job….that speech will result in yelling, crying, and gnashing of teeth…mine and yours. “Do Hard Things” Speech +Timing=National Make Your Daughter Cry Day.
As I sit here tonight, glass of wine in hand, interpreting the language of adolescent tears…I declare every day National Make Your Daughter Cry Day. I do not think we have had a day this summer that tears have not been shed. I am making it a national freaking holiday. And if you have an adolescent girl, you are welcome to join in the festivities. Tears….I mean CHEERS!!!